confessions
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Tip to those struggling with an ED:
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I just want to curl up in a ball and dissapear. Go to a place where these demons in my head couldn’t find me.
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fuck “clean eating”
fuck skipping dessert
fuck choking down salad
fuck calling a mashed up banana and some oats a fucking cookie
fuck constant body checking
fuck being cold 24/7
fuck flat abs and thigh gaps and collarbones
fuck never going out because “oh shit there’s going to be food”
fuck loosing people
fuck you ed
(via shadowofabutterfly)
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sunflower sutra: Reasons that I want to recovery from this disordered eating... - So that I can regain menstruation, regulate hormones naturally.
- So I can eat intuitively without fear of losing control.
- To be able to understand if I am hungry or not.
- To be able to stop eating before I start feeling like I am going to binge.
- So I can be a vegan, healthily, not…
(via shadowofabutterfly)
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Guys I need help.
I’m trying to recover after struggling with an eating disorder for 2 years now. The last time I tried to recover I got triggered back into my eating disorder. Now, I’m sitting here the same thing that triggered me last time just happened. And I know if I don’t stop now I’ll never get out of this hell. But can’t I recover and just gain like 7 pounds? Not 22 lbs?!?
Help me :( I don’t know what to do anymore. Am I alone in this?
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Hardest thing I’ve had to do… but I’m ready to change. Recovery.
